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Where Are You?



Where are you? Who are you? Here's me.



Let's do this in three parts, OK? We'll start with some some physical stuff. Then I will talk about my likes and dislikes. Finally, I'll tell you about my personality. We'll just kind of segue smoothly between the parts...


I am 56 years old. I am six feet tall. I am white and my hair is a sort of medium brown with some gray in it. I work out three times a week so I am slim. I weigh 165 pounds. I am told that I am handsome. I feel good about myself.

I would like you to be between the ages of 45 and 55. You are slender and between 5 and 5-1/2 feet tall. You feel good about yourself and the way you look.

I have a tattoo on my upper left arm. I got it relatively late in my life. I found the design for it on the web. I also have four gold earrings in my right ear that I have worn continuously since 1982. Some might think it frivolous for me to sport body art. I don't care. I like it. What's your opinion?

I'm not into flashy clothes. I tend towards solid colors, mostly blacks and grays but I have started to wear warmer colors. I wear blue jeans and occasionally cargo pants. I've grown somewhat endeared to the latter. They will become a dominant part of my wardrobe, I guess. I like t-shirts. Tights with long t-shirts seem to be the fashion now for women (has that ever gone out of style?) so I wouldn't be surprised if those were a part of your wardrobe. It's not always necessary to hide your graceful figure. My remarks will be gentle and sensitive. But it's always your call.

When I go out I like to dress up a bit, however. I don't own a suit and would not wear a tie. But I can get a casual look going. I assume you can dandy yourself up, too. I like to have an attractive woman on my arm when we go out to eat or see a movie. I won't look at other women when I am with you.

I love to see movies, in the theater or at home. I'm a little out of practice getting out to the theater but I still watch at home. In fact, curling up in bed to watch a movie is one of my favorite things to do. Do you like that, too? I like science fiction, fantasy and horror movies that don't involve slashing and gore and zombies. I love the Lord of the Rings, Star Trek and Star Wars. My collection contains other things, however. Gandhi is one of the best movies I have ever seen. Apocalypse Now, an analogy to Robert Conrad's Into the Heart of Darkness is also on my A-List. I have all of the Muppet Shows on DVD and a warm spot in my heart for Hallmark movies, which inevitably bring tears to my eyes just like romantic comedies. I have difficulty sitting through a musical. I don't like Rambo-like movies. What are your tastes? Would you like to snuggle up together in bed and watch a romantic comedy with me?

One of the great things about working out is that I can indulge myself now and again by eating out. I love Indian food but to my embarrassment cannot remember the names of the dishes. Ditto for Chinese. I'm a little tapped out on Chinese, quite frankly. I still love Italian food and can hit a pizzeria at the drop of a pin. I can barely resist ice cream and can easily gorge myself on it. I try not to do this too often! I've wanted to experiment with new types of food but have not done so lately. Would you like to go out and explore these places with me?

My musical tastes range across a more or less broad spectrum. Let's start with classical. I like Carmen Burana but am otherwise bored with opera. Mozart and Bach are my favorites with a touch of Vivaldi. Moving onward I like the soft lilt of Dido and the sensuous voice of Sade. I have a thing for female vocals and vocalists. I love synthesizer music. My favorites are Enigma and Blue Stone. Coming from somewhere in the recesses of my mind is a taste for Goth, although I don't listen to it very often. I like the playful rock of Devo, Talking Heads, and the B-52's. Every once in a while I'll trot out some old Rock 'n Roll from the 70's. Does anyone ever get bored of the Beatles? I don't like rap or country and western music. I'm out of date with new music and keep telling myself I'll catch up but never do. Sigh. Do you have any suggestions? I'm always eager to listen to new music.

I don't read as often as I would like to. I used to read a lot but drifted away from it for some reason I can't fathom. Books are so interesting. I want to get back to reading. Can you help me? I have read historical fiction by Jeff Shaara which I couldn't put down once I started. I love the screeds by P.J. O'Rouke, a conservative Libertarian whose views I don't agree with. His writing is nevertheless hysterical and doesn't always involve politics. Dave Barry is a hoot. I like reading about World War II. Creation by Gore Vidal is on my all-time favorite list as is A History of Western Philosophy by Bertrand Russell. One of these days I'm going to get around to finishing Inferno by Dante. I feel like I really should be reading newspapers but I don't. They bore me, quite frankly. Except for the sports pages. What are your reading tastes?

I'm a liberal, plain and simple. I detest the Republican party. I cannot understand why so many ordinary low-income and middle-income people vote Republican. It is not in their self-interest to vote that way. I'm a registered Democrat. I thought I was a Libertarian for a while earlier in my life but abandoned that as I came to understand what it really means. (I love Bill Maher who is a liberal Libertarian, on the other hand.) I used to be an independent but when things took a horrible turn to the right I decided to declare my true allegiance openly! I tend to get a bit cynical about politics. If you are a Republican that is going to pose problems for me.

I love sports. I am a Giants and Forty-Niners fan. I'm old enough to remember what baseball games at windy Candlestick park were like. I much prefer AT&T park. I don't get out to the park as often as I would like, darn it. I've never been to a Forty-Niners game--the tickets cost a small fortune. So I content myself by watching sports on TV. Baseball and Football are it for me. I wouldn't mind trying to watch other sports, however. Do you like sports? Can you tolerate someone who does but won't bore you with it if you don't?

I don't drink but I don't mind being around people who do. Alas, I smoke. I've tried quitting many times, always unsuccessfully. I still want to quit, however. I've always been around people who smoke and that hasn't made it particularly easy for me to quit. Do you smoke? It doesn't bother me if you do. But it would be really great to face the trial of quitting with a partner to provide encouragement. If you are a smoker let's quit together, OK? Are you willing to help me quit if you are not a smoker?

I spent 30 years in a computing career. I started before the Internet existed. At Berkeley I participated in research to develop the Internet. My role was to bring the Internet to Macintosh computers. I also developed a computer program that is the basis for email as we know it. After five years I moved to live in Gothenburg, Sweden. I worked at a research institute to (once again) bring the Internet to Macintosh computers. I also helped to develop the Scandinavian Internet and developed an email standard there. Back to Berkeley I came where I introduced the Web and managed a small group of Macintosh support analysts. I left Berkeley to work at Charles Schwab where I tailored their trading application for the Macintosh. I also did a lot of other things. Are you still working? What do you do?

Somewhere along the line I came to the realization that I had for all intents and purposes tapped out what I could do for computing. My career was complete. I made my contributions and decided to retire.

I'm an artist now. I work mostly with ink on paper. I've branched out to acrylic on canvas. I'm working on my first painting. It's coming along well. I want to beef up my portfolio before applying for shows. The painting I am working on is the first in a series of abstract desert scenes. I just finished a series dealing with Mental Illness called Madness. My work is abstract. I'm influenced by M.C. Escher, Salvador Dali, Hundertwasser and Klimt. You can see my work on my website at artjesse.net.

I like going to galleries to see what new artists are doing these days. I love the MOMA and I also like the Museum of the Legion of Honor. Would you like to accompany me to revel in art? I also like the Museum of Natural History and the aquarium in Golden Gate park. I flat out love the park.

I love San Francisco. I've lived here for thirty years and I cannot imagine living elsewhere. I love picnicking on the lawn in front of the Exploratorium while feeding the ducks in the pond. I love walking the streets of the City and exploring all of its distinctive neighborhoods. Would you like to come along? We can ride Muni together.

Here's my eccentricity. I don't drive. In fact, I have never had a driver's license. People have on occasion suggested that I learn to drive. I've been ho hum about this. People get perplexed. They wonder how I get around the Bay Area. If BART doesn't go there, neither do I. Thoughts?

I want to make love. I want to see you next to me in bed, soft and silken and ready for love. I want to touch you and caress you. I want to slowly raise myself over you and ever so gently penetrate you. I want that love to be sensitive. I also want to fuck you like a rabbit. I want to take you in every way imaginable and have my way with you. I want us to collapse, exhausted, into the soft covers. Looking up at the ceiling I want to feel you draw close to me and lay your head on my chest with my arm around you. I want to fall asleep this way.

Not every night has to be about making love, however. Snuggling up in pajamas to watch TV is OK, too. I'm at an age where I have control of my hormones. A nice, sound sleep with the comfort of someone beside me definitely has its merits. I don't want to feel the bed empty beside me. I want to share it. I want a warm body to fill that void. Do you feel this way, too?

I do indeed have some baggage from my life. I think I handle it pretty well, however. I'm not needy about it and have no axes to grind. I expect you have baggage, too. Anyone who does not have baggage at our ages has, in my opinion, lived a shallow life. I've loved, been loved, succeeded and failed, seen the world both here and abroad and I even had a broken heart. It's all part of life. How a person handles all of this is what matters. Do you hold a grudge? I hope not. Have you loved? I hope so. Can you share the experiences of your life with me?

I am a daydreamer. I muse about my past, try not to be to perplexed by the present and drift into long thoughts about what can and might come to happen. It has its advantages. I wait well. But being a daydreamer can actually be something of a nuisance to the people around me. I am liable at any time to simply drift away. I'm getting better about controlling it but, quite frankly, it just comes naturally to me. I'll try to not do that with you but be forewarned. If I get that faraway look in my eyes it doesn't mean I'm not interested in you or bored with what you are saying. I've just slipped into oblivion and probably need a good shake or knock on the head to bring me back to the here and now.

I've not always been a loner in my life but have at times been so. I have always toggled back and forth. It doesn't bother me. At the time of this writing I am in my loner phase. I sense a change in me, however. I think I am drifting towards a more active social life. We'll see.

I am witty and charming. I have a sardonic sense of humor and I'm not ashamed of trotting it out. I can almost always get what I want by charming my way into it. This attribute has also gotten me out of a lot of scrapes in the past. Sometimes I know when I am turning on my charm and I know then how it works for me. I've been told that this is part of my personality when I am unaware of it. But I do not use charm to manipulate people. I am always sincere.

I'm a romantic. People have said this about me but, quite frankly, I've never seen it myself. I know that I am not a pessimist. I'm not a Pollyanna but I like to see the good in people and events and expect things to turn out well. Maybe this is why I like romantic movies. Is that what it means? I really can't say. Maybe you can explain it to me.

I don't do anger and confrontation well. I hate getting angry and avoid it. I'm still a little perplexed when people get angry at me. I know intellectually that a reasonable amount of anger is natural and healthy in a relationship. Getting over it and re-bonding strengthens a relationship. I need to work on this. I loathe anger and confrontation. I don't even like seeing it in other people.

I believe in true love. I know that a healthy friendship lies at the basis of love and I am determined to do this first before romance. But once involved I am monogamous. I have never cheated on my love.

I hope I find you. I hope you find me.

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